The weight of the world is piling in around me today.
They say my type of person feels too much. (Well, they say “more deeply than the average human.” Most days I say, too much.) They say my type of person is constantly aware of the problems of the world, so the little girls in brothels and the people on drugs and the parents who don’t love are all my burden too. It’s a long day. A hard day. A frequent day.
There’s nothing I can do.
People are dying, lives are being ruined, and I can’t restore the heart to anything. Even if rescue is just outside the door, people are too stupid to get up and leave. They’re so close… but I look at them and I know they’ll never make it. I can see the end of their story and I know it ends in failure. I write stories all day about people who face their fears and end in victory. In the real world, most of us die wrecked.
I like to take the weight of those problems and blame myself when I can’t fix everything.
But today I remember what must be most writers’ favorite aspect of Christianity: we win. Deep magic from before the dawn of time comes and scoops us up, and with a simple yes, we have power again. We have victory. Hope, not just of struggling well, but of succeeding, lies open to us.
It’s a hard world to live in for all of us, and harder for those of us like me who feel it too much. But I am curling up with this hope (and a good book) in the library today: we have been redeemed. We can be made brand new.